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Sexy Monthly Horoscopes, by Sarah Kulkens

ARIES: (March 21- April 20)
Lucky Colour: Blue
Lucky Day: Friday
Racing Numbers: 7.8.9.3.
Lotto Numbers: 4.12.23.24.35.41.
Next month could be a bit of a cold shoulder in the rams self esteem. However don't go out butting someone else's backside because of it. Treat yourself to some self pity. On the 15th don't start ogling some stranger, better to sick to your own old goat, or whomever. Think very positive, use some alluring tricks and some very sexy innuendo's and your partner may give you something nice.

TAURUS: (April 21- May 20)
Lucky Colour: Red
Lucky Day: Wednesday
Racing Numbers: 7.8.9.3.
Lotto Numbers: 1.6.8.23.35.22.
Your paranoia may come to the fore this month. Don't confide this feeling to your partner, or they may take advantage of you in more ways than one. Around the 20th make sure no peeping Tommy can get an eyeful of you whilst you are performing. Do not give in to temptations of the spiritual kind, or you may land in some ticklish situation with some pervert you don't particularly like.

GEMINI: (May 21- June 21)
Lucky Colour: Silver
Lucky Day: Saturday
Racing Numbers: 6.3.4.6.
Lotto Numbers: 3.5.45.13.39.40.
The beginning of the month may bring a tasty morsel into your parlour; so make sure you keep yourself clean up till then. You'll impress your cronies with some of your knowledge around the 15th. On the 22nd. You could get some real hot and juicy gossip, so relish the moment. Don't get involved in any " come up and see my etchings" type of business; for you may end up with a very sticky business.

CANCER: (June 22- July 22)
Lucky Colour: Orange
Lucky Day: Tuesday
Racing Numbers: 7.3.1.5.
Lotto Numbers: 6.12.24.34.45.11.
Some of the cold sores and other impurities of the skin may clear up in time for you to have a fair complexion by the middle of the month. You need this because prince charming comes charging into your life, so don't go messing around with some chump or chimp before that time. After the ball is over, you can give your passionate nature free rein and you can let the bed linen crackle with your ecstatic electricity.

LEO: (July 23- August 22)
Lucky Colour: Green
Lucky Day: Monday
Racing Numbers: 9.7.6.4.
Lotto Numbers: 9.4.5.45.33.21.
Some of your past indiscretions will come knocking on your door, some may even want to knock you on the nose. You could avoid this by some good old fashioned crawling, even if it goes against your nature. Don't worry however too much however, because you'll be your old roaring, cock strutting self adoring self again fairly soon. Some of your fans may even be in need of your help. Give it to them, so know very well that you can extract something extra out of them at a later date.

VIRGO: (August 23- September 23)
Lucky Colour: Lilac
Lucky Day: Monday
Racing Numbers: 6.7.3.4.
Lotto Numbers: 2.13.24.34.41.11.
Don't get bored with the same old routine this month. Let your hair, and anything else you care to, down and your fantasies run wild by the 15th. You could have a little windfall and this will make the pleasure a bit easier to take for the old purse. You will be in good company towards the end of the month, and you can share some of the load with them.

LIBRA: (September 24- October 23)
Lucky Colour: Cream
Lucky Day: Wednesday
Racing Numbers: 8.9.5.4
Lotto Numbers: 1.14.23.34.42.33.
The end of your misery is in sight, only a few more weeks to go. Some cad is asking for payment for a little favour he once did for you a long time ago. Tell him to go and swim in a shark invested waters. After the 20th. You feel the urge to do something unusual; like going au naturelle whilst doing your house work. Someone or something is bound to get an eyeful.

SCORPIO: (October 24- November 22)
Lucky Colour: Violet
Lucky Day: Tuesday
Racing Numbers: 2.4.3.7.
Lotto Numbers: 2.4.12.23.31.22.
Don't lock yourself up in your little ivory tower. Tell others about your schemes and dreams, and if they stat laughing, start stinging them in places where it hurts most. However pick your mark very carefully, otherwise your stinger might get crumbled in the process. You could feel energetic on the 12th. Bad luck this is a day of rest. Some of your friends may try and hit you for a handout, tell them you are not a charitable organisation.

SAGITTARIUS: (November 23- December 20)
Lucky Colour: Green
Lucky Day: Monday
Racing Numbers: 8.9.3.4.
Lotto Numbers: 5.12.23.34.45.
You cannot rely on others to sort problems. If you let them advise you, you could get really stuffed up. Your best bet is to get some spirits to help you out. This spiritual treatment could relax you no end. If however, you start seeing spirits, just invite them in and make them feel at home and toast their health and well being. Be very helpful and friendly towards the end of the month.

CAPRICORN: (December 21- January 19)
Lucky Colour: Blue
Lucky Day: Tuesday
Racing Numbers: 8.4.5.6.
Lotto Numbers: 1.13.24.34.42.22.
You may be pleasantly surprised by rewards for favours given in the past. On the 18th. Be very alert and do not give in to pleads from friends for you could end up with a nasty case of " fat lip" on the 30th. Don't admit you are wrong, but keep a stiff upper lip; unless you got a fat lip on the 18th. Don't over do the debauching or you could get a pimply face.

AQUARIUS: (January 20- February 19)
Lucky Colour: Red
Lucky Day: Friday
Racing Numbers: 4.5.6.2.
Lotto Numbers: 1.3.12.24.34.45.
This month you will find the need to attract attention to yourself. You will probably get it from a stranger and not from your mates. Your so called mates may even try to abuse you. Do not let this little setback deter you, but exhibit a healthy appetite for anything lustful. You could get a soul mate to go away with for a dirty weekend, so make sure you take something sexy with you and go hell for leather

PISCES: (February 20- March 20)
Lucky Colour: Silver
Lucky Day: Wednesday
Racing Numbers: 7.8.3.4.
Lotto Numbers: 2.13.23.34.41.11.
The planets may decide that you have had too much of a good thing and stop you in your tracks. So don't go looking for trouble, for trouble will do a good job looking for you without your help. Don't go for any trips before the 20th. Best to stay home and enjoy your fish and chips. Some foolish sucker may share his greatest secrets with you, not realising what a blabbermouth you can be so don't disappoint him.

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